Single mothers
Jun. 16th, 2007 04:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stephbgDisclaimer: I am a married mother of three cats with a degree in psychology, interested Aunt to six nieces aged 4-27, and no basis of authority or experience from which to discuss parenting of human offspring.
No-one has said anythng to me directly, but in hindsight I fear I may have caused unintentional offence of the foot-in-mouth variety.
During a recent post about the stupidity of not allowing gay couples to adopt I suggested that a child needs not a "mother and a father" (as cited by lazy politicians and members of the religious right and sadly mainstream) but the influence of two adults in a loving relationship.
I'd like to point out that that doesn't necessarily mean two adults in a sexual partnership and/or living together full time. The significant point as I recall was the availability of a close-to-home long-term example of at least one loving and respectful relationship. Two healthily bonded sisters, happy grandparents, or a single parent and a good friend.
i.e. I'm not suggesting that anyone I know is automatically a bad parent if they choose or happen to be "single". All the "single" mothers of my acquaintance have a significant network of friends and family to provide support. None are stupid or chasing extra welfare payments.
However, I did recently live in a welfare suburb for over 6 years, where gangs of children including toddlers in nappies wandered the streets and there were many teenage mothers I doubt could provide for them. Those we could do without.
No-one has said anythng to me directly, but in hindsight I fear I may have caused unintentional offence of the foot-in-mouth variety.
During a recent post about the stupidity of not allowing gay couples to adopt I suggested that a child needs not a "mother and a father" (as cited by lazy politicians and members of the religious right and sadly mainstream) but the influence of two adults in a loving relationship.
I'd like to point out that that doesn't necessarily mean two adults in a sexual partnership and/or living together full time. The significant point as I recall was the availability of a close-to-home long-term example of at least one loving and respectful relationship. Two healthily bonded sisters, happy grandparents, or a single parent and a good friend.
i.e. I'm not suggesting that anyone I know is automatically a bad parent if they choose or happen to be "single". All the "single" mothers of my acquaintance have a significant network of friends and family to provide support. None are stupid or chasing extra welfare payments.
However, I did recently live in a welfare suburb for over 6 years, where gangs of children including toddlers in nappies wandered the streets and there were many teenage mothers I doubt could provide for them. Those we could do without.
